Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
Randomize
