my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
Randomize
