You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
I told my mom happy mother's day then rubbed my belly and said "Oh, and happy grandmother's day too..." She started sobbing. You were right, that wasn't the best way to tell her.
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize
