I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
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