spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
My vagina is very pro this idea
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