the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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