So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
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