I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
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