Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
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