I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
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