What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
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