I want to stick my p in your. b.
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
You want to complain about your sex life to me? Right now mine consists of trying to masturbate lightly enough not to wake her up with bed shakes. Go. Fuck. Yourself.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
Randomize
