I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
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