I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
Randomize
