In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
Randomize
