He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
