hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
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