eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
Randomize
