no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
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