hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize