I don't think brook has ever known best
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
The one thing I know about living in Vegas is the closest I'll ever come to being a father is singing the theme song from Full House to a garbage can while I eat an entire birthday cake.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
Randomize