Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
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