vagina is talking i cant
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize