I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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