Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
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