I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
