what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
Randomize
