with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize
