Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
last night I used snow as a chaser
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
