end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
