was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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