if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
Randomize
