That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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