You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
Randomize
