didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
Both the cop and the paramedic were hitting on me while I was on the ambulance. My boob fell out and they just about had full on erections right there. They Came back two hours later to sign my cast with their phone numbers. #stillhotwhilebleeding
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Randomize
