Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Randomize
