I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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