Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize