there were more penises there than on chat roulette
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
Randomize
