if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
As shirtless as possible
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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