I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
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