party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Randomize
