I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
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