dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
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