spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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