I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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