It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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