I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
