This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
he kept farting in my kitchen and blaming it on the dog. then we went to wendy's and he spent twenty minutes in the bathroom. im pretty sure he shit his pants.
you should have known when you found out he drove a mini cooper not to hang out with him.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Randomize
