Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
You blacked out and then went around stealing other peoples phones and leaving yourself voicemails
I got two from random numbers, the first was me and said "Don't forget you murdered Josh in Wii Bowling"
The second Jenn said "You are ridiculously smart for drunk dialing yourself"
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
Randomize
